That discomfort is irrelevant. Praise matters! Compliments Matter!
At an Entrepreneurs’ Organization talk, Mike Lipkin once said, “I always love a compliment. Because it means one of two things: Either you really mean it, or you thought enough of me to lie to me. Either way, I’ll take it.”
But there is something meaningful about a compliment.
The more descriptive, the better. And the more you value the person giving the compliment, the more meaningful it is.
One study found that compliments offer a “common neural currency” as monetary rewards. (https://lnkd.in/eW2z3d_C)
And there is no cap. Giving more praise and acknowledgment doesn’t diminish its weight.
or as the study says: “Kind words do not become tired words.”
But here’s the rub – We often hold back?!?!?
In fact, one Harvard study by Erica Boothby, Xuan Zhao, and Vanessa Bohns found that 90% of people believe that they should compliment people more often. Yet, only 50% of people in one study who wrote down a compliment for a friend actually sent it to their friend. (A single compliment can make a big difference – https://lnkd.in/eh_5sqz4)
The truth seems to be that most feel awkward about the delivery.
More than 70% associate discomfort and embarrassment with giving a compliment. Yet, 88% feel valued by receiving one. thanks Daniel Pink for highlighting this article in Inc. Magazine by Jeff Haden (https://lnkd.in/e8WXGVNU)
Worse yet, in spite of the evidence, we seem to continuously underestimate the value of our words!
That same 2021 Harvard article added “Just as people must eat regularly to satisfy their biological needs, the fundamental need to be seen, recognized, and appreciated by others, as it turns out, is a recurring need at work and in life.”
What will you do this week to actively acknowledge, complement, and bestow gratitude on those who work and live with you?
Oct 17, 2021